Life is.....Healing

One of the reasons why I started this blog was also to use it as a "scripture journal" and share some thoughts and wisdom I have learned over the years.  My last post about friends brought up a lot of emotions and some conversations that normally would have been like pouring salt into open wounds...but they didn't.  I have moved on from those frustrations and no longer hold grudges.  How did I do this? Well, I'll tell you....

Several years back, I was an angry person.  Most of the anger was directed at myself, I hadn't learned how to deal with things, people, frustrations, failures, frustrations about people....  I also had some issues that weren't allowing me to be internally (or eternally) happy.  I had a week that should have rocked my world involving the passing of my Grandpa.  I knew what was coming before the doctors said he didn't make it and I knew without help, I would be in trouble.  I didn't have the strength myself to handle it, like everything else that was just swept under the rug.  That is when I learned how true and real the atonement of Jesus Christ is.  When standing in the ER and watching my dad mouth the words "he didn't make it", I immediately felt a comforting assurance that it was ok, and I mouthed back "I know".  And I was ok with it! The love of our Savior had healed my heart before it broke.  For anyone that knows me, I am a blubber baby when it comes to family & saying goodbye, even if it's just for a week or two.  I cried when Grandpa left (who wouldn't?!), but I was under control and able to be a strength to others.  That is when I learned about the power to heal.

Since said experience, I have had many other instances come where I've needed to employ the same power.  Sometimes it works right away, sometimes I have to suffer a little, but it only gives me a greater appreciation and idea of what our Savior went through to be able to succor us.  I have also learned that the healing power goes beyond forgiveness, way beyond.  As I learned from my mom, it can also heal physical pain, aka headaches and migraines, which I've had well over my fair share.  I'm working on dealing with the emotions & stuff causing the headaches before they cause them.  Again, enter the atonement.  Let Him carry the burdens!  He already carried them in Gethsemane, don't let what He did go to waste.

Another thing I learned about healing and letting go, is you have to let it go! He can heal the hurt and the heartache, but if we keep bringing it up, it's our own stupid fault! Don't loathe in self pity! Get over it!  One of the last times I was home with my family, one of the brothers had a fire going in the backyard (his way of "dealing" with things).  I had decided that I was going to write down names or events of things I was still hanging on to and burn the list.  I did just that and even though it was cold & slightly raining, I stood there and watched that list burn.  Then I took a big breath and blew it out hard.  I immediately felt relief.  Those aching feelings that I had were lifted and I knew I could move on.  And I did.  I still think about some of those things, but I don't have any hard feelings towards those people or events.  I am a better person for what Jesus Christ has done for me and by claiming those blessings and right of the atonement.